What do you do to motivate yourself to get out and about to do “car” things?

"Nothing" (nothingatalluseful)
01/13/2020 at 16:00 • Filed to: None

I’m terrible about what I’ll call destination activities. Looking back on my childhood, I was extremely lucky. We grew up fairly rural, so when I wanted to ride my go kart, I went out in the back yard and rode it! Same with dirt bikes, 4 wheelers, sleds, boats, etc.

Now that I’m somewhat of an adult, I live in large suburban sprawl, but I have, well, mountains and stuff just an hour, hour and a half away. But now that it’s not my literal backyard, I’m really bad about driving somewhere to then do something (again I’m talking vehicle related activities....track, trails, etc). It doesn’t help that the family isn’t as interested in doing those things as I am, so I don’t have anyone else spurring me to go do those activities. Maybe I just haven’t found the right thing to motivate for, yet.

So what ends up happening is I start building things for a purpose, like the track built Miata, but the track was too far away. Or the 4Runner that I at least didn’t go as hard core over the top as I did the Miata, that doesn’t hit the trail as much as it should. Maybe that will change this coming year, but that depends on having willing participants. It’s a big reason why I haven’t at least made the mistake of buying dirt bikes, as they’d end up paperweights.

How do you motivate, Oppo? And how involved in your hobby is your family?

Have a Jeep J6 for your time.

DISCUSSION (52)

HammerheadFistpunch > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:04

Im struggling with this. The key I think is to find like minded people. Friends or even clubs if needed. Something with a calendar. Or if you have an itch try and get other people on board, it will push you forward a little more.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:04

I ski.

I taught my kids how to ski.

Now my kids ski with me.

Sometimes I have to really yell at them to get out of bed.

But they still like skiing.

I like watching anime.

My kids like watching anime.

We watch anime together.

My wife does not like anime.

Her loss.

Jesus Arias > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:05

Well in my family all of us guys like cars. So naturally we go as a group to events, meetups, etc.

CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:07

My dad is quite involved in the hobby, he’s always had interesting cars and done interesting things.

My wife has been pretty involved, coming to Oppo meets across the PNW.

Although, as I approach my 30's I feel change is in the wind and that family (and I by extension) will be less involved in cars.

jminer > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:13

I have the same struggle, it’s tough to stay motivated. I take a couple small trips a year but usually alone as my friends aren’t into that awesome kind of nonsense and my wife is usually too busy.

I don’t have an answer, just want t o say I feel you with this too!

Nothing > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever
01/13/2020 at 16:13

We have other like minded activities (hockey, sports, music), I’m the solo car person, though.

slipperysallylikespenguins > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:14

I’ve had the same problem with my motorcycle the last couple years. I used to take a nice peaceful 30 minute ride after work to clear my head. Now I live in a place where I have to deal with an hour of traffic to have a 30 minute peaceful ride. My solution is hopefully moving next year back to the boonies.

As others mentioned, having similarly minded friends really helps to motivate.

Chuckles > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:14

Find good food in the area of interest. When I had my Miata, it was a lot easier to talk the gf into a 2 hour back road drive if I framed it as “I found this really cool ice cream place. It’s 2 hours away. Want to check it out?”

If your family isn’t strictly into car stuff, find other things nearby that you can combine to make it an adventure that interests everybody.

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:17

My dad is the one that actually helps on mechanical work. My kids do enjoy taking joy rides in the Z but I’m not letting them touch it beyond an oil change, tire rotation or help me bleed brakes. I have offered my oldest to drive the Datsun but she is scared. It’s actually easier to drive than my Mazda or subaru, the engine is very torquey and hard to stall.

Nothing > Chuckles
01/13/2020 at 16:17

That’s a good idea, too. Once were out of hockey season, which will be sooner that we think, I’m thinking of following someone else’s lead that I’ve heard about. Every Friday, after school/work, they pile in the car and drive an hour away to eat somewhere new.

TysMagic > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:19

I’m kind of just forcing it tbh.
The Mrs is hit or miss on getting in to car stuff. She doesn’t get the appeal. That said she’s only come to me with CnC. No actual driving events...but when I toyed around in the Miata she would get scared very quickly of even the slightest tail happy turn . Lack of knowledge results in fear kind of thing. But she enjoyed the miata and it helped her become more interested. She likes driving the 340. She’s never felt a car with some actual power to it and she finds the bmw thrilling.

I feel like the pieces are there, she just needs to feel that all come together - but she won’t go to an autox or a track day or what have you with me to learn/understand car control better. That said, she’s tentatively committed to riding with for the poker run coming up. I’m concerned that may be a bit much, but we’ll give it a go.

As to the forcing it comment, I signed up for the poker run regardless of if she comes. I’m going to the BMW Club meeting/lunch and she has no interest in it. Additionally, those things have dates assigned to them. I am doing X on Y day. So I’m also motivating/forcing myself to actually get out and do enthusiast things.

Chuckles > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:19

Depending on the age of the kids, convincing them to give up their freedom every Friday night can be a tough sell, but I like the idea in theory.

Nothing > CarsofFortLangley - Oppo Forever
01/13/2020 at 16:21

I got the bug from my dad, he was a dirt tracker when he got back from the war, and always had something to tinker on. When I was a kid, being in the garage with my dad made me feel like a man. Ha.

I’ve had the bug to get what I would consider an interesting/fun country road cruiser to enjoy with the fam.

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:22

I also grew up middle of nowhere so have similar motivation issues due to distance from living in the city. I’ll get back to this.

My ex would be happy living her entire life on the couch or just indoors in general. There was nothing I could do to get her to try things I like. This wore me down and we’re no longer together (more reasons than just that).

My girlfriend now on the other hand loves doing outside things. She comes to oppo meets and enjoyed driving fast in Canadia, we went snowboarding yesterday, she also has a motorcycle. All the things.

I often suck at self motivation. Not always, but probably more often than not. On those days, she does an excellent job of getting me going.

To motivate myself, if the activity itself doesn’t do it, I think of all the wasted days sitting at home in the past and how much shittier I feel physically from that in the moment, and how much shittier I feel long term emotionally from being a lazy ass. Another part of the problem is that I hate planning new things that I'm unfamiliar with. If I'm not feeling motivated, having to plan something new will turn me right off, whereas something I've done a thousand times is much easier to just start doing.

Nothing > slipperysallylikespenguins
01/13/2020 at 16:23

I’d like the semi-boonies, but we have 8 years left here. That’s when my son will graduate from our walking distance school. Several years ago, we had the idea of buying some land in the mountains to relocate to during the summer months, that’s not a bad idea...

Maxima Speed > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:26

I ride motorcycles with my dad but I don’t even bother with the car I just use the car to get from A to B . Im honestly prob not even gonna autocross this newer Solara. My car is pretty boring so unless im driving properly quick its not that interesting. I do love road trips though and would like to do some more of them this year. The Solara is perfect for road trips.

Nothing > HammerheadFistpunch
01/13/2020 at 16:26

I think a calendar is key. When we out stuff on a calendar, it’s much easier to commit. My fam tends to be much better with a planned activity than just a “let’s see where we end up” type of thing. I tend to be more of the latter. My wife always asks how I know my way around some backroads in various areas...i just like to get out and explore.

DutchieDC2R > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:26

When I bought my ITR, I had this crazy idea I’d make a bunch of friends in the Honda scene, got all social and go to track days together. I started bulding my ITR specifically for that purpose. Well, not necessarily for the other people, but still thinking I’d enjoy group track days with my Honda ‘friends’.

Guess what? The Honda community is as toxic as any other large gathering of people (well, maybe apart from the EurOppo group) and now I’m putting the ITR back to stock because f*ck it.

Nothing > Chuckles
01/13/2020 at 16:27

I’d most likely modify it to once/month to start with, no reason to go too crazy! He’s still young enough that we control his universe (10) pretty easily.

Chuckles > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:34

10 is manageable. But telling a 16 year old that they have to spend every Friday night with their family is a lot less easy.

10 is old enough to get him involved. Let him pick the type of food, or narrow it down to 2-3 places and let him have final say.

And it doesn't have to be food at the end, but something that the non-drivers will enjoy. My other half really loves waterfalls/rivers/creeks etc, so if I can work a stop into the ride that includes one of those, she's more interested in going.

Tripper > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:39

My main drive is working on them. I enjoy driving but only cars worth driving. However I will wrench on anything. My dad- mobile is a snooze to drive, but I’m buying up suspension parts like a MFer to correct that, even if it doesn’t yield the result I want, the fun is in the project for me.

My family is somewhat involved in that my wife is supportive but she does not care about cars unless it’s an Austin Mini or an FD RX7 .

To give you an example, when I told her when I was thinking about buying a 1975 BMW at auction with the car located in A msterdam. She said, “I don’t care as long as it isn’t any more expensive than your Audi was.” We had just had our first child, lol.

My daughter fuckin’ loves everything that “goes”, but she is 1.5 so that’s about as involved as she gets.

My parents are also somewhat involved as they are also petrol heads and let me stash a car in their garage fo free!

The problem for me is making time to drive the car that I have left at my parents. They are not far away and I am over there weekly, but whatever car it is will be parked in and we’ re only there for dinner or what have you.

Unfortunately that has been the M3 for a few months. I plan to swap it for the 02 after the next hard rain as the only garage I have at home is a “car tent” which really isn’t enough protection for the 75.

CobraJoe > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:48

I’m in nearly this exact situation, minus the “mountains and stuff”.

My plan is to build a car to be fun to drive on the street, even in mild traffic, and then use it for commuting duties. Problem is, that car is still a couple years from being done.

I was even searching for local car clubs today. There are quite a few, but they all seem to be either “Classic cars only”, “Specific models only”, or “Lets do illegal shit !” (I’ve been in a couple “specific model only” clubs before, one was great but disbanded, the other was a bunch of old people talking about how much they spent on their cars)

LimitedTimeOnly @ opposite-lock.com > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:50

When I decided last fall to do more camping, I set a goal of a minimum of once per month. I then basically figured out that this meant it generally would be the first weekend of the month. Up until the turn of the year, I’ve managed to pretty much keep that schedule, but I’m counting a holiday roadtrip for that.

Anyway, setting a schedule may be a way to go for you as well. Plus, now I need to justify buying a camping vehicle, which is also motivation.

My wife likes camping, but isn’t that into road trips, so this is a great way to road trip with her.

Nothing > Tripper
01/13/2020 at 16:53

I love T he garage time too. My son liked helping on the 4Runner, and that may be part of the root of the problem for me recently. I have nothing left that I want to do to it, and as something “fun” to drive, well, I won’t list the 4Runner as fun to drive. After selling the Cougar, a funny thing happened in these past 18 months, I like not having the major project car. To me, fun doesn’t have to be a sports car or anything, just something that feels “good” to cruise around the back roads with.

My wife is supportive, but she really doesn’t have any interest. She wants her vehicle to get her from A to B comfortably. When I keep talking about a certain vehicle after a length of time, her response will usually be “I don’t know if you think you need to ask me, but I don’t care what you get for your car.” Not being rude, it’s her way of saying go get what you want, within reason.

Snuze: Needs another Swede > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:55

How do you motivate, Oppo?

In fits and spurts. I get hot on stuff and will go for a few days and work my butt off on a project. Then shift it to the back burner for a bit.

Regarding family, m y dad is a car guy, we go to a few car shows a year together (usually a few of the big Carlisle shows, which are an hour from him, 2 hours from me, so not far ). I also have friends I grew up with or went to college with who are into cars so we go to shows together, meet for Cars n Coffee at Katies a few times a year, etc. We will occasionally get together and help each other out with car projects.

That’s about it for me, though. I mainly just like to tinker. I like the idea of racing, did Formula SAE, and tracked my bike, and discovered I’m A) not that fast and B) not motivated enough to do what it takes to get faster. In other words, I like racing but I don’t love racing. I’m not near any good 4x4 trails or anything like that, so that kind of stuff is out too. So mostly I just tinker and go to car shows, and honestly that’s about enough to keep me interested and involved.

Regarding the wife, I’m kind of in AMGTech’s boat. My wife is pretty “indoorsy”, though in her case it is somewhat justified (medical issues). Still, she will occasionally pitch in - help me when I’m working on sometime (i.e. hold the flash light, hold this wrench here, etc.), go with me to look at cars, and generally listen when I talk about cars and make appropriate noises (though I’m pretty sure most of the time she at best doesn’t care and at worst has no idea what I’m talking about). Again, it’s enough to keep me satisfied.

Nothing > AMGtech - now with more recalls!
01/13/2020 at 16:55

Good points. I’ve wanted another bike for a while, but I get the stink eye when I bring up motorcycles. Darn health care worker!

My wife likes to get out, often she just doesn’t know what she wants to get out to do.

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:57

It’s weird to use this word in reference to this, but “accountability” (similar to what HHFP said). I have a group of guys that I take a spring & fall backroadtrip with twice a year (for well over a decade). I’ve kind of become the organizer, so I know that if I don’t get it going, it’s not going to happen. It’s always a challenge to make it happen (dad with 3 kids), but we always have an amazing time and it’s so worth it.

I need to find this same kind of thing for an annual (minimum) track day and for several offroading/camping trips each year. Kids’ sports kill so many weekends...

Tripper > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 16:58

I told another oppo that I’m fearful of completing projects because then “I’m done.” My ranger was meant to be a forever truck, then I did everything I wanted to it and sold it.

Nothing > CobraJoe
01/13/2020 at 16:58

I remember when I went to a Miata meet when I had mine. I was early 40s at the time, and the youngest by at least 25 years. The ages didn’t bother me, but I’m not an empty nester grandparent, and thus socially we were not in the same place at all.

I’m still trying to figure out what the mild fun car would be for me.

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > DutchieDC2R
01/13/2020 at 17:00

Well, that sucks. More OPPO meets, I think.

wafflesnfalafel > AMGtech - now with more recalls!
01/13/2020 at 17:06

yeah - ditto for me. My wife is a sit and read all day on the couch kind of person as well - I have really made a point not to let that limit what I do. If I know there is something I really want to do and I know she won’t like it I just go do it, and that’s ok.

CobraJoe > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 17:09

Age differences don’t really bother me, I love talking nearly anything about cars. Problem is, the local Mustang club was full of guys who were either spending a ton of money on new Shelbys or spending a ton of money getting a classic professionally rebuilt. I really have no experience with either of those scenarios...

I figured my ideal fun street car would be something like a dune buggy. Open air motoring, feels fast at normal speeds, capable of mild off road drives... Basically make every drive feel like an adventure. Sometimes I wish I started somewhere a little closer to the final product.

(Here’s the first picture of my chassis:)

Kinja'd!!!

interstate366, now In The Industry > DutchieDC2R
01/13/2020 at 17:46

As a Honda owner, I also hate most Honda owners. Maybe I’ll have better luck with the FR Toyota crew.

Danimalk - Drives a Slow Car Fast > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 17:57

My Dad and I are really into everything automobile, and I have a couple friends somewhat interested. So my dad and I do car things together mostly, b ut I still want to do more.

I recently joined the Cult of Miata with my recent purchase , and am looking into some local clubs to join. I’m actually only somewhat interested in the autocross ers. I’m actually really looking for groups that take road trips or do road rallies and slightly more social stuff like that. (I need more friends haha) We’ll see what’s out there and if I like the people, but I’m going to at least give it a try.

DutchieDC2R > interstate366, now In The Industry
01/13/2020 at 17:58

You'd expect the Toyota crowd to be more adult-like, more civil. Let me know how that pans out...

interstate366, now In The Industry > DutchieDC2R
01/13/2020 at 18:09

They at least partially are. I’ve already seen some cool over-30 JZ-powered car owners, but then every time I go to Japanese Classics’ open houses it’s pretty much fuckboy central. Still, that’s better than I can say for the general Honda crowd.

atfsgeoff > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 18:28

T he struggle is real.

I have a dual-sport motorcycle that I’ve taken legit off-road maybe twice since I got it a year ago. I think the key is to find other people who are into the same thing and schedule time with them to go do said things.

Nibby > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 18:38

drinking bottles of used automotive oil

Urambo Tauro > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 19:36

Here’s how motivation often works for me: I have two vehicles, and often find myself more motivated to work on whatever I’m actually driving at the time. Of course, t his has a tendency to create problems when I block the more-or-less driveable car in behind the one I’m actually working on. WHY DO I DO THIS TO MYSELF

AfromanGTO > Nothing
01/13/2020 at 19:39

I really like detailing mine and going to shows. I am not as hard core as I used to be. I would like to go mod crazy, and do some track days. The wife isn’t happy to hear that, so we generally just go carting instead. Although she does like it when both cars are super shiny, and the SS’ wheels are super clean.

Nothing > AfromanGTO
01/13/2020 at 23:27

I enjoy detailing, too. I may finally get a pressure washer and a foam cannon, I’ve been wanting both.

Nothing > atfsgeoff
01/13/2020 at 23:34

I want a dual sport bike, I just know it’ll end up sitting there a good portion of the time. I used to ride a lot until I moved to CO...20 years ago.

Nothing > Danimalk - Drives a Slow Car Fast
01/13/2020 at 23:44

I really liked my Miata. I lost my mojo with it after I replaced all of the body panels. I found a guy nearby that was parting out an R, so I scored doors, hood, trunk, lip spoiler, front and rear bumpers for my not rusty, but dented up Miata. I removed the old, bolted the new on, and had to leave for a work trip the following week. My wife called while I was away the car sat outside in a hail storm, ruining every body panel I had just put on. Ugh.

Nothing > CobraJoe
01/13/2020 at 23:50

I love open air vehicles. I love boats and being on the water, and find convertibles give me a similar feeling. It’s what has had me thinking about Jeeps lately.

I’ve wanted a Mustang for a long time (thus the Cougar), but I don’t have the budget for a restored car, and sadly, very few people are selling vintage Mustangs in excellent condition cosmetically that need mechanical work . I’m not up for body resto. While my wife really likes them, too, she’s of the mindset that the older a car is, the cheaper it should be...so, say, a ‘68 Mustang should be no more the $2-3k. Ha,

Nothing > Snuze: Needs another Swede
01/13/2020 at 23:52

Tinkering and shows are where I’m at. I’m not in it for big projects anymore. I’m lucky enough that there’s a large C&C about 5 minutes from my house, a friend I go to the Mecum auction here with, and the Golden Super Cruise a couple of times a year.

Nothing > davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com
01/13/2020 at 23:57

This year, I vow not to let summer get away from me. My wife has actually mentioned going camping, which is a first for her. (Mentioning it, not the actual camping part). We may have a couple of out of town trips, but mostly, I’m hoping to fill weekends with some dirt time. It’s easy here to find the hard core guys, but I’m not interested in rock crawling. I just want to get a level above “passenger car” off road. My son seems to enjoy it, but we have to have a pot at the end of the rainbow. Me, I can go and just sit and take in the scenery for hours, which is probably something I should do on my own more often.

Nothing > LimitedTimeOnly @ opposite-lock.com
01/13/2020 at 23:59

A schedule is a recurring suggestion. We need to pick a few destinations and just DO IT.

CobraJoe > Nothing
01/14/2020 at 00:19

Jeeps are great, and I’ve only ridden in the back of a 30 year old jeep that was in pretty poor shape.

There are other classic cars that are more affordable than classic Mustangs... fairlane and torinos and 60s Thunderbirds can all be found in the $5k to $10k range (though it seems like no one is willing to do body work, the ugly cars are always the cheapest).

But speaking of open air vehicles, the occasional T-bucket can be found in that price range too... that sounds really tempting to me...

AMGtech - now with more recalls! > wafflesnfalafel
01/14/2020 at 01:21

It is ok. That is a mistake my ex and I made; not doing that.

shop-teacher > Nothing
01/14/2020 at 07:18

Some years back, 5ish years maybe, I simply got fed up with watching other people have fun with cars. I vowed to get off my ass and actually do something with them. At first I looked into going Lemons racing, but after we research I realized that even that was out of my budget. Turns out it easily costs $5 g rand to race a $500 crap can.

Through Oppo I found out about rallycross. I tried that, and fell in love. Fortunately, I had that one friend who wanted to come with, so that helped a lot. That led to the RallyMetro, also through Oppo. Never in my life will I be able match the dollar:fun ratio that little bigger provided.

Simultaneously I found myself buying and riding scooters for the first time. I got a different friend into that. I talked him into impulse buying a cheap Yamaha Zuma 50. I had no idea what kind of monster I was unleashing there. He bought four scooters and a motorcycle in less than a year.

Rallycross also led to the Gambler 500-Illinois. Which the second year we combined with the scooters. 492 miles on a scooter in one weekend ... It proves to be the dumbest and most fun thing ever.

That is turning into an annual thing. This fall, separate from the Gambler, we rode 360ish miles through some amazing roads . My wife has dubbed it Idiot Fest, and we’re going with it. We’re currently planning the third one for this September. It’s growing each year.

I guess you just have to find the thing you find irresistible, and then just get out there and do it.

Danimalk - Drives a Slow Car Fast > Nothing
01/14/2020 at 09:29

Aw man that’s rough. So sorry that happened to your poor car after so much work went into it :(

Hopefully, post Miata, you can still try finding a group of car folks to get together with. I’m still checking out the groups/clubs around me, but I’m hoping having more car people in my life will be a good start to getting me out and doing more car things.

davesaddiction @ opposite-lock.com > Nothing
01/14/2020 at 12:15

Your aspirations are very much like mine. I just want to get out to some places that not many people go, and immerse myself in nature with my family (and dogs, if they’re lucky). Add in a nice long hike with a great view, a fire, some good food, and a couple beers, and I’m pretty much in heaven.